Culitvating happiness

I had a great weekend last weekend. My friend Brie came to visit and we had some nice long talks and a fun shopping/lunch trip to Lawrence, KS. Lawrence is definitely the coolest city in Kansas (university town) and my future guests can count on my willingness to continue to explore it every chance I get...especially the Yarn Barn and Sarah's  Fabrics!

Today Brie sent me a link to a site/blog called The Habits of Happiness. I find that I believe in the ideas expressed here. I don't think one necessarily has to share these things but I do think that sometimes sharing them makes them more real, more concrete, more of a commitment. I also firmly believe that I am responsible for my own happiness (and consequently you are responsible for yours), can't lay that one on anyone else.

So, back to Leo's blog for a moment, you may ask, on what authority does he claim to be an expert on happiness? I wondered the same thing so I checked out some of the links on his web page. He appears to be a mindful writer who likes to share his ideas in order to help others. That kind of person tends to be attractive to me (probably because I am an idea person myself, INFP, more on that another time), not because I take their word for anything but because I like to explore new ideas to see if they work for me. I'll be the first one to toss out an idea that doesn't work for me...well, no, actually, I won't even toss it out, it'll just disappear from my routine and I won't even notice that its gone.

And really, of Leo's four habits that make you happy, I already do three of them pretty regularly.  First, I exercise. Yeah, yeah, sometimes I don't, but more often than not lately, I do. And I've started keeping a log of what I do when which seems to motivate me.

Second, I meditate. I don't really think of it as meditation, but for me it's part of a relaxation routine that always helps me go to sleep. Leo says, "Meditate for just 2 minutes a day...just notice your body, and then your breath. Notice when your mind wanders, and gently return to your breath. You become the watcher of your mind, and you’ll learn some useful things, I promise."  For me, the trick is to do this while accepting that whatever comes to mind is ok, that I'm not "doing it wrong."

I also really like the idea of helping someone every day. Again, for me, trick is not to make it a stressor (Oh no, one more thing to add to my list of "things to do" which usually equals things I should do but don't really want to do) but to recognize that I've done it after the fact. For example, today, during my office hours, I chatted with a student who had a question about an assignment. Simple for me, but very likely (given what I know about her) a big relief for her.

And finally, three good things. That's one of my favorites. I used to do it with my staff in the library where I worked at the end of each of our meetings. Each of us would name one "good thing" we'd done or received or were looking forward to.  Leo ups the ante a little by asking for three good things every day, but I don't think it's all that difficult.  For example, three good things about today:

1. my mind is clear and calm enough for me to write a blog post (means I'm not feeling overwhelmed by unaccomplished tasks),
2. I worked hard today to prepare lessons and learning activities for my class meeting this weekend...and I enjoyed doing it because I learned from the exercise,
3. I am looking forward to traveling to Salt Lake City tomorrow.

So there it is, the beginning of a new habit. I won't promise to do it here everyday but I will do it whenever my mind is at ease.